St. Nicholas Day

I received thank you's from my children for the gifts 'St. Nicholas' sent this year-the usual entertainment DVD, caramel corn, and ornament. When I was a child I put my shoe in the front hall on the night of Dec. 5 in hopes St.  Nicholas would drop by and fill it with treats. Even in grade school I remember the hallway full of shoes and a treat or two for every student. I read the happy letter of my grandchildren baking cookies and jumping up and down in anticipation as they left their shoes out on the night of the 5th. Tuesday morning there were great cheers for the ornaments of the year (missing tooth, cowgirl for a birthday theme,  T for turkey because of  a special Thanksgiving activity and enthusiasm) and little candies. I have also enclosed Fontanini figures in my St. Nicholas package to build up their nativity scene. This year the 7 year old had a camel for the kings, and there were flying angels for the girls and the two-year old got King Herod to much laughter. What??? Villains are the best characters! My grandchildren are growing up in a very traditional Catholic household. Santa Claus is not part of their December celebrations. I am grateful the Catholic upbringing I had can provide a continued joyful tradition of the original St. Nicholas for these little ones. And so is my daughter. Thank you to my Mom for trekking Catholic so that my daughter and I can bring this to the next generation.

Anniversary Celebration

Today marks five years that I have professed as a Third Order Carmelite. I remember the great joy I had at the day of my profession. There were a few others at this daily Mass who celebrated with me. They commented on my happiness. I still feel it, this joy, this rightness of my calling to the lay religious life. There is peace and confidence in following the will of God. Why is it I drag my feet in doing some of the other things He asks of me? I know better, yet, like St. Paul, 'I do the very thing I do not want to do.' Ah, I am learning, too slowly, to more than want, but to be willing to do His will. I live the joy in many ways. May I strive to live it in all ways.

Reflection

I thank my God every time I remember you, constantly praying with joy in every one of my prayers for all of you. --Phil 1:3, 4
It is a joy for me to pray for the people on my prayer lists. It is good for me to pray for others, for those outside of my family, and to see prayer in the big picture of the world. It is good for me to trust in God, lifting people up, placing them mentally before the Throne of God. Because I do this with others I can more readily accept this Trust in God attitude for myself; letting go and letting God. Talking to Him I am letting Him have this 'whatever'. And, with practice,  I find I am ready to accept His answer. I have to listen to this answer, though. I can hand over my concern and say, "Here you go, Lord, it's Yours." But I tend to leave it there in His hands and go on with my life, instead of waiting a bit and listening to what God is saying beyond the first response of 'Thank You.' I turn away too quickly, I think, because I think there is nothing I can do, want to do, or want to be told to do. Maybe God's response to this place in my journey is Job's Bible verse for me right now: At least listen to my words....

Read on a church marquee

What if God is waiting for a sign from you?

A Shower of Roses

I am a long time member of The Light Weigh, a spiritual weight loss and spiritual growth program. During part of our 12 week sessions we pray a novena to St. Therese of Liseaux. The copy of the novena that is provided to us includes a request for Therese to show us roses each day as a sign she is listening to us. I have seen roses in gardens, in bouquets, and on glassware, but the best was yesterday's manifestation. Late in the evening my husband was decorating a tree and I was wrapping up St. Nicholas gifts to send  to the post office. We had an Elvis Christmas CD on the player and I heard him singing a song about Roses. The chorus repeated that word over and over and that was how it got my attention. St. Therese and Elvis! What a duet!

Offering Up Joys

If our sacrifices captivate Jesus, so do our joys; but our happiness must not be self-centered. We must offer to our Spouse the little joys that He sows along the way of life in order to take our hearts and lift them up to Himself--St. Therese of the Child Jesus.
This was the devotional reading for December 2. As a cradle Catholic I have long memories of 'offering it up' reinforced by grade and high school nuns and members of my family. But I only remember offerings of sacrifice usually wrapped in begrudging reluctance. This concept of offering joy is a gift to me. Yesterday I was walking the dog and heard a flock of birds in the sky. They were flying high and I did not recognize the call. They were white and could have been snow geese or even swans flying fast with the rays of dawn reflected on their breasts. I have never seen this in real-life before. I am sure I was standing with my mouth open gazing at the heavens. This is a gift of Great Joy I offer to my God.

'At least listen to my words...'

My job title is Information Specialist. People call and I answer their questions or direct them to others . My coworker received a call yesterday. I could tell from his side of the conversation that he was trying to answer the person on the other end of the line but was repeatedly interrupted. He kept trying to answer, but from experience we knew that the answer wasn't the one wanted and therefore it wasn't being heard. I need to pay attention to how I approach the answers I receive from my prayers and conversation with God .

A New Liturgical Year

St. Faustina encouraged the companionship of the saints. For the past several years I have offered the choice from a sack full of saints names to my Carmelite friends and Mass companions. This year St. Frances Cabrini will walk the Liturgical year with me. I spent a little time reading about her life. I found pictures of her in-corrupt body on some web sites. She was a Sister of the Sacred Heart. Perhaps her intercession will bring me closer to the Sacred Heart of Jesus this year. Or she may have other plans. I purchased a little medal of her at my Catholic book store and attached it to my scapular. It was difficult for me to 'retire' the Padre Pio medal I wore for the past year. There is much to read and study about that saint. A 365 type book of his writings kept him close to me everyday. I will have to work a little harder to keep St. Frances Cabrini in mind. This will not hurt me.
This year's Bible Verse is from Job 21:2-3. At least listen to my words, and let that be the consolation you offer. Bear with me while I speak.
I hung my Advent Wreath on my front house wall. Last year a priest suggested we bring Advent to our exterior home decorating. I decorated a large wreath in blue and pink and white flowers and ribbons, and added plastic Christmas bulbs that looked like candle flames.No one commented; but I knew what the decoration meant.
I have changed indoor Advent wreaths this year. I bought a wreath base that included statues of the nativity characters. And I added a larger greenery wreath to circle it. The figures looked better in the catalog than in real life, but they look more Catholic on my table than just greenery and candles. They are growing on me. I add paper stars each evening on which I have written the names of someone I wish to remember and pray for this season.
I have challenged my prayer group to consider themselves a nativity character for the Advent season. Last year I chose 'king.' I read a wonderful book called The Revelation of the Magi. The writer suggested there were really twelve kings and he named them. My nativity characters walked with me all year long! This year I chose 'camel.' I was not happy. About all I know of camels is that they spit. Again, I researched more about them and found the root word of camel is 'beauty'. Ah, now that is something to consider for the month of December: How I can be beauty for the Christ Child. Or how He can see beauty in me.

Lectio Third Sunday of Easter

During Lectio on Sunday my verse of choice/work was ‘Stay with us, for it is nearly evening and the day is almost over. ‘—Luke 24

I could not help thinking about Evening Prayer and reading this verse as a call to make time for it. I have a hard time after work trying to leave the office and dynamics behind. I am hungry and I have a rush hour kind of drive ahead of me (how tough is that in FW?) and I have a dog that is inconsistent in housebreaking and I never know what will be there when I come home. I have my book of Christian Prayer in the car. There have been peaceful times when I can use the bridge I walk to my car as a passage from work to the time before I am home. I look over the river where I park and say my evening psalms sometimes well and sometimes in rote and sometimes in the middle of rush hour as I stop and start my way home.  This verse, ‘it is nearly evening’, can be literal, it can be for my age in years, it can be for my working life or for about anything. But today it is a comfort that it is a Scripture I can pray and they are words that Jesus heard and answered in the affirmative. He did stay with the disciples, even if only through a meal.

Rosary of the Week

When I attend the Holy
Family Retreat at Notre Dame in August, the Holy Cross organizers always give the participants a rosary.  This is one I received at my second retreat. It has the Holy Cross symbol in the center piece. On the reverse is printed,"the family that prays together, stays together." The crucifix is modeled after the one used by Blessed Pope John Paul II. As he will be beatified this next Sunday it will be a good reminder to pray for him and the people attending the ceremony .

Dancing like the Daffodils

As a member of the Third Order of Carmel I have had certain responsibilities. The latest was to get to our regional Catholic newspaper information about our group in anticipation of expanding our holy numbers. I just received a call from a guy who read about our article in the paper and wants to meet with us! I am dancing! I have prayed about evangelization as one of my Resolutions for the year. I pray for vocations to the priesthood and the religious life, especially for Carmel, when I pray each third mystery of the rosary. ( Mother Teresa taught me this rosary prayer idea) And today I received a call and, Oh, I have dragged my feet about the article and have felt so uninspired in putting it together and agitated about my responsibility. But I did it anyway.and today a response! I realize that this is just the beginning, that we have to shoulder the responsibility for being the face and hands of Christ in Carmel, but still, I feel my prayers have been acknowledged. And I am most grateful.

Rosary of the Week

This week I am praying with a rosary I purchased at Notre Dame, South Bend. It is a wooden Eucharist style rosary with a central image of the host and chalice. Today's prayer calendar request is for the little one's preparing for their First Communion within a few weeks. I have taken a photo of my rosary along with a photo of DD1's FirstCommunion class. This event was at St. Mary's in Johnson City, Tennessee.

Weed and Feed

The weather was warm and sunny this weekend. Everyone was outside playing or working in their yards. I walked eight miles on Saturday Actually this was not planned. i got lost on a path in a neighborhood new to me. My dog Watson was such a trouped to hang in there enthusiastically with me. i also stopped to pick up spring fertilizer for our lawn. As I was walking the spreader around the yard I was thinking about the name of the product and how it related to Lent. Through sacrifice I am to weed out the things that cut off my time with God. And through prayer I am to grow closer to the One who is All Things to me. Is it working? There is a week until Holy Week and then there will be time for an in depth evaluation. I have to let the process work

Rosary of the Week

I purchased this rosary when I was in Medjugorje. It is made from the stones around the  Bosnian village. The crucifix has the name of the village as well as Mary's words "Mir. Mir. Mir." (Peace. Peace. Peace.)For the photo I hung the rosary on a picture I purchased at a Mejugorje conference at Notre Dame last May. It is a photo of the statue made of Mary to the descriptions of the six visionaries. Her eyes seem to  follow as you move around the room. The beads really  grab tactile attention as I pray because they are rough and very oddly shaped. It is a wonderful way to nudge my memories of  my time there. These rocks are visible all over the area. I spent a week there in 2007 after a visit to the Holy Land with a Peace group.This June it will be 30 years since the first apparition.I am attending another Medjugorje conference at Notre Dame in a few weeks.

Television

I thought last night was somewhat of a lost cause. I came home from work and was tired from a late night the night before staying up to watch Notre Dame lose to Texas A&M in the Women's NCAA championship game.
I sat in front of the TV and turned on cable crime shows. Subconsciously I probably feel life is outta control and I like things wrapped up when the bad guys get their just punishment. Or maybe it is just that the heroes are cute and I like to watch the underlying tension of romance. I am not a psychologist. However, both of my choices had Catholic themes in them . Surprise! Grissom, a character from some TV show met the character of a priest who recognized him as a lapsed Catholic and invited him back to the church. I was disappointed in the script that Grissom got the last comment and walked out and away from the altar, but I have thought about his line. It was the standard excuse that he believed in God but didn't want to be told what to do by a religion. The old pride of knowledge and self-importance that keeps so many people away from the Faith. We think we know better than the Word of God, looking to ourselves for the answers thinking we are bigger and better than God, defining Him in human terms because we do not have faith that He is more than we could ever comprehend. 
On today's date in Sacred Space, the Irish Jesuit website, there was perfect response to this character's problem. I  include it here:

Some thoughts on today's scripture

• Our churches rely on structures, on theology, liturgy and human organisation. Jesus puts all of these in perspective by reminding us of our need to come to him for life; only when we do this will our structures have meaning.

And how do we come to Him? I hear, "Oh, I find God in nature." Truly, how often do you go out and search for Him there. Do you spend quality time in searching for God in the trees and the flowers ? I would bet it is a fleeting thought on the way from A to B in a busy life. How do you know the voice of God unless you spend time listening to Him. I know from experience it takes a lot of time to recognize it and even then the evil one tells lies so close to the truth in order to move us away from God in the battle for our soul. Life is not easily lived. Why rely on the limits of human self when there is the gracious and loving God and His Word and His Church to help you through?

I also spent some time with Bones . The character Booth is a Catholic and there are often discussion between his character and another re: the faith. I like it. There is no preaching.  I don't think his character is written to live the faith fully, but respectfully having a Catholic character is better than  shows full of people who do not address their faith at all.

Writing of faith, today's Writer's Almanac informed me that today is the birthday of Buddha and people in Japan have traditionally dress his statues in flowers as it is a day of gratitude. I am trying to imagine places like the many shrines I visited while there now destroyed by the tsunami and earthquake, a landscape without flowers and people moving through the tragedy of great loss . I pray they may have gratitude somewhere in their hearts.Gratitude is a path to healing.

Catholic Relief Services is providing help to the people of Japan. I have donated. I believe in their ability to get my money to the people who need it.

Feast of St. Vincent Ferrer

I edit a prayer calendar for my Christ Renew's Team. This is today's entry:
Tues 5 St. Vincent Ferrer. Vincent felt that he was the messenger of penance sent to prepare men for the judgment. For twenty years he traversed Western Europe preaching penance and awakening the dormant consciences of sinners by his wondrous eloquence. His austere life was but the living expression of his doctrine. The floor was his usual bed; perpetually fasting, he arose at two in the morning to chant the Office, celebrating Mass daily, afterwards preaching, sometimes three hours, and frequently working miracles. After his midday meal he would tend the sic children; at eight o'clock he prepared his sermon for the following day. he  usually traveled on foot, poorly clad. Well, his schedule is not mine. Thank God He called me to a different evangelization. But it certainly seems Vincent fulfilled his call with enthusiasm. May it be said to be the same for all of us.

In today's Magnificat there is a  meditation written by St. Vincent. Commenting on the words of St. Bernard, Vincent said, "But what is the use of all the other qualities, as the same saint remarks, if the strength is lacking which establishes the other virtues in the fortress of constancy, arming them so well that the fury of this persecutor (the evil one) cannot expect to vanquish them?"

'The fortress of constancy. '

A quote by Mother Teresa crossed my desk from another source. She said we are called to faithfulness, not to success.

An emailed web page introduced me today to  the word pre-mortem. The inventor of the term calls us to imagine something that we want that has not yet been achieved and to think about failing at its success. We are to imagine what we would think  in a post-mortem;  what we would have changed in hopes of attainment. This would help us in determining the tools for success.
I am sure persistence, constancy, and faithfulness to the right path would be some my tools. Slip shod activity, and lackadaisical attitude do not a successful person make. I must listen to the saints; and learn from their wisdom.
Constancy and faithfulness. These are my watchwords for today.

Rosary of the Week

The rosary I am using this week was given to me by my DDL. She bought it for me when she was in Spain. It is beautiful cloisonne in blues and pinks, whites and greens. This weekend I received a long back ordered alabaster statue of Our Lady of the Rosary. It is her name I chose when I was professed as a Third Order Carmelite.

Movies

I am a total movie fan, although this has been more of a year for books than for movies, I did manage to see a fewthis Lent.
The first was Bella. I wasn't exactly sure what to expect; maybe a movie so blatantly Catholic that it would be off-putting to those who did not know our Faith. What a surprise! The main character prays before meals. And that's it! Other than that he just lives his faith in the decisions he makes and in trying to talk the girl into choosing life for her child. It was a fun movie and suitable for anyone. The family dynamic was so real. I would certainly recommend this to anyone.
Right after that I watched Italian Lessons. It was in a language I could not identify, Swedish or something, but I read the English subtitles. I think it has a mature rating because of some unmarried sexual situations, but I certainly cheered for  the Catholic character. Some guys were talking about her and one warned the other that because she was Catholic not to expect a sexual relationship until they were married. It was said and accepted seriously. How I wished that were the norm for those of our faith.
And the third movie was The Nun; another Swedish or something documentary about a young girl, one of eight or nine children who thought she was called to the Carmelites. The filmmaker, an atheist, filmed her with her family before she went into the convent, just before final vows, and again had permission to film her and her family a few years later. As a Third Order Carmelite I thought this movie would be interesting, especially an inside  look into a cloistered order. And it was. I especially en joyed her family life and the reactions to her decision and how they learned to live with it. She took the name Sister Mary of the Annunciation. As March 25 was that feast, it was a privilege to pray for that young lady on that day. 
I have read about the life of Jessica Powers, a cloistered Carmelite nun and poet. I found a website of her convent,It is in Wisconsin and within traveling distance. Perhaps I shall visit sthere sometime. And I know of Sr. Wendy, the art historian. I have been entertained by her many books and television programs. There is a fascination in the cloistered existence for those of us who will never witness it beyond a book or very briefly in this movie. Powers convent website had a breakdown of a Carmelite's Day within the cloister. Their prayer life is much more structured than for those of us out here in this world. And I was jealous that every Thursday was a retreat Day for the community. We Third Orders have to be disciplined on our own. It is called grace! Which reminds me, it is time for Evening Prayer.
blessings,
Nancy

Halfway Point and Time for an Evaluation

OK I have not written as I expected I wanted to. Still fearful of this and putting myself 'out there' for others to read. During these past weeks I read of the death of a blogger in Libya. this 20 something was the voice of the streets for the resistance according to NPR. He was shot while getting a story for his site. Dying for what he believed. Sitting down in the comfort of my living room and gazing out on my quiet suburban street is not that kind of war. I guess we all fight our own battles. I went to a parish mission Monday evening and the line of the opening song resonated with me.." Do not fear, words I have trouble embracing, for fear is the path of my making" from I Will Go by David Kauffman.
There are many other Lenten resolution I have kept.
I have not read any fiction. I met with a book group on Tuesday and they were fascinated by my sacrifice. Someone at work recommended a book and when I said, "It sounds good but get back to me after Easter." she said, " Oh, that's right! You are giving up fiction for Lent!" She is Latter Day Saints, or was at least raised in that faith. the non Catholics are intrigued by the idea of sacrifice. Well, I must admit giving up fiction has been more of a conversation point than a sacrifice for me.Maybe this is the evangelization opportunity I have been praying for! I have a stack of really good NF books waiting for me. Read half of Mistaken Identity last night about the Taylor University van/truck crash and the families of the two girls whose identities were mixed up at the accident.
I am not shopping on Wednesday's and Friday's. That has been a problem, I must admit. I do not think when I head out and this has caused me to think ahead and to wait until later.
I am saying my Resentment Prayer faithfully everyday and things are changing in my head about these four people. I brought one something that I would never have considered doing earlier. I smiled and laughed with another and spent time with another doing nothing, and this would not have happened in my walled up phase. I have questioned another about a difficult situation and we found common ground and laughter. I like it this way much better than holding on to my hard feelings.
My basement? I have quite a few shelves cleaned and boxes to be brought up to the car for delivery elsewhere. I have not worked everyday, but more than I have here at the blog. It is always good to take stock of where you have been . If I don't look back I may not see what road I am walking and where I am heading.
Lent is halfway over. I still have 20 more days to claim change.

Blessings,
Nancy
This was fun.:) I have a list of topics I wanted to write about this past few weeks. I'll be back....

'Resentment Prayer'

As a Third Order Carmelite I am called to pray Evening Prayer. sometimes I will say it with Magnificat, sometimes with Universalis online, sometimes with my book of Christian Prayer and sometimes I will forget. Last night I opened my book of Christian Prayer and Psalm 20 in Week 1 exactly reflects my prayer for those people I am praying for this Lenten Season: 'May the Lord answer in time of trial; may the name of Jacob's God protect you. ...May he give you your heart's desire and fulfill everyone of your plans. May we ring out our joy at your victory...May the Lord grant all your prayers.'  Glad I didn't need to reinvent the wheel. Wonder why I thought I had to?
Last night the cable news channel discussion was whether or not to contribute to the people of Japan in their disaster situation. The nay sayers were arguing that 1)the monies donated to Haiti hardly arrived and therefore keep your money in your pocket, and also 2)that Japan is a First World country and rich and has enough resources to take care of its own.3)And also did anyone donate money to the US in our problems with Katrina?
In response: Do the people of Japan need assistance? Well, duh! Therefore donate to an organization that has a proven track record of reputable assistance. The research into your charitable contribution resource is our responsibility. I searched the UCCB website and communication from Japan is poor and the assessment of needs best served is not yet complete. I hardly believe that the US Catholics will ignore the situation. Patience. Ameans of donation through the Catholic charities will be available.
The entire country is in trouble because of power outages and economic repercussions.IIt will take years to clean up  and to reestablish export supply lines. Agriculture is surely affected, even in subsistence farming and gardens. Perhaps the Japanese government is more efficient than ours, or perhaps it is just as efficient. Don't you think there are people who need our help? I do not doubrt that Japan's resources will be strained. I believe their people need our help.
I read of a community in the East, I believe it was in India, who gathered their pennies and sent Katrina refugees something like $600; many times what their village could earn in a year. It is hard for me to believe they are the only ones who ignored our plight in our time of need. Even if no one outside of the United States donated to help, what excuse is that to keep our hands in our pockets. We are called to help the hungry, the naked, the homeless, to help bury the dead and comfort those who are in sorrow. To do nothing is not to choose the way of Christ. 

Lent on the Weekend

I met someone at my Carmelite meeting this weekend who is in battle with the devil. I believe the devil is real.I believe her battles with the evil one are real. She seems to be praying every prayer under the sun and fasting and still she is at war. I do not pretend to understand why this is happening to her. By reaching out to the Carmelite community she is asking for and hopefully accepting our prayers. We are praying rosaries for her. When I wake in the night I think of her and her battle and I pray Mary and Michael  be at her side. I pray the Holy Name of Jesus. I do not know what else to do. The guys in our group want to 'fix it.' So do I. How do you 'fix'  someone of faith in a war like this? I think we will reassess our actions next month and see if what we are doing is enough; or if we feel our actions should be different. Perhaps take a page out of Ignatius of Loyola. We were discussing this Sunday's Gospel and the temptations of Jesus in the desert before she shared with us. In Lectio two of us were struck by the angels ministering to Jesus after the devil moved on til another day. Perhaps we are her angels

At Sunday's celebration of Holy Mass the Catechumens spent time with their sponsors at the front of the church in declaring their wish to join the faith and their readiness to attempt the final instructions. They signed their names in a large book that was visually shared with the congregation. Our choir, 40 some voices strong, sang a spiritual, Sign Me Up. The only woman in our choir who has the voice to carry this song sang the lead. It is not often we hear spirituals in our northern Indiana church. There were smiles on lots of faces and toes were tapping. That is pretty enthusiastic for us. There was no hand clapping, swaying or shouts of hallelujah, but oh, it was grand! I have only seen gospel singing in the movies, you know, like Forest Gump. Someday I am going to attend such a service. I hope I am brave enough to shout and clap and sing along.

I finished Fr. Calloway's book: No Turning Back, a Witness to Mercy.

Fasting

As I was doing my Morning Prayer and the Daily Readings for Lectio I realized I was avoiding the word 'fast.' I counted, and 'fast' or 'fasting' was mention eighteen times between my two readings. Not something to ignore, I guess.
As Catholic, I am often encouraged to fast and pray as Jesus says it requires both to battle great situations successfully.  In two separate books this week I read of striving to be dead to sin, and with fasting not to feel impoverished, but enriched. Several years ago I faced a health issue. In order for the medication to work effectively I had to give up certain things. It was hard at first. I wanted to be able to keep the same lifestyle and change the outcome. Impossible. Once I learned how to let go of what I thought I could have at any time, it no longer beckoned to me. I now can walk past it without temptation. I can watch others ingest and know I don't have to be bothered with the mistaken feeling that I had to have it. My life is enriched. I am no longer impoverished by a shortage mentality.I have let it go and all the baggage that attends it. I am free to enjoy much healthier and tasty things.
Fasting for spiritual purposes serves the same end. If I offer up my craving for sweets and for the party atmosphere that attends it, I also offer up the sugar high that makes me cranky, the guilt of eating something I don't 'need', the uncomfortable memory of childhood, and the work of losing the weight gain which is far harder than opening mouth and inserting calories. In return I believe that my sacrifice is united with the sacrifice of all the others giving up something for the good. And I believe when I get to the 'otherside' I will know who I helped and how my sacrifices affected the future of the world.  I believe it will be a good thing. Both my DH and a coworker heard an irreverent slam on fasting on one of our local stations on Wednesday. Our discussion of the radio program's suggested topics for fasting included wondering how a radio station could get away with such 'entertainment.' Would making fun of Ramadan or  Kwanzaa be tolerated? Then why would making fun of a Catholic tradition? I wondered if anyone who had heard this sound bite had commented. I couldn't find anything about that show on their radio web site; I admit I became distracted by the news of the earthquake in Japan and the resulting tsunami and destruction. I shall fast and pray for the people have lost so much.

Sensory Experiences of Lent

Sound: the minor key of the songs used at Holy Mass
Taste: the hot tea I used to quench my appetite on a day of fasting and abstinence.
Sight: the ashes visible on the foreheads of those in attendance at Mass. I did not see anyone else with them throughout the earlier part of the day.
Sound again: Discussing in public, at work, where to attend Mass during Spring Break Week on campus when Catholic services are not scheduled.
Smell: Baked beans for dinner cooking on the stovetop.

Ash Wednesday

The time to respond is now. It is a very acceptable time. Call an assembly and gather the people.

Our Parish is the largest in our diocese and the 7 p.m. Mass was packed. I am guessing about 900 people were there to celebrate Holy Mass and to receive ashes. Of course Monsignor talked about prayer, fasting and almsgiving. I reflected on the first day of lent and my planned activities.
I typed up a little Resentment Prayer to say each day for my least favorite people. and I said it for them.I did not feel self-righteous or holier than thou or even all that good about it. Rather I felt guilty that I even had three people on a list like this!I guess that is why we are asked to pray in secret. God knows my feelings for these people. I believe He put praying for them in my heart, too. I shall secretly ask them at the end of April if any of their dreams came true. (and no, I am not talking nightmares)
Remember, I decided to give up fiction for Lent. This morning my husband handed me a library book he had picked up  for me.. When I reserved Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter I was number 36 on the wait list. I am taking it back unopened tomorrow. It will be something for me to look forward to  in May.
A meeting member gave me her copy of Fr. Calloway's autobiography, No Turning Back. I read two chapters without even thinking about time. I also have Unbroken waiting for me, as well as Rick Steves Travel as a Political Act ,and two books came in today's mail...Journey in a holy Land by Pennington and Making a Heart for God, a Week inside a Catholic Monastery by Dianne Aprile. Perhaps giving up fiction will not be such a sacrifice...I did not have any soda today. I wasn't tempted.
I put the 40 Days for Life yard sign up. I hope others are participating; if not, I guess I am a reminder.
Because it is Wednesday I had also planned to refrain from shopping. I stopped at Walgreen's and printed a couple of photos and bought Vegetable soup for lunch and didn't even think about my 'fasting ' plan for the day. I asked Our Lady's pardon, but still, I didn't even think twice. Thou shalt think twice before acting must be the eleventh commandment, the one that got broken on the way down the mountain. It is not yet engraved upon my heart.
I did just walk up from the basement. I put in 15 minutes packing up boxes of things I purchased as gifts for others. I found the felt on the pool table under them and put the boxes up in my clothes closet out of the way of prying eyes. My hairdresser told me about the Christmas shoebox collection starting up again. There are many things in those gift boxes that I can bring to her.
Day 1 of Lent: 4 for 5. The time to respond is now. It is a very acceptable time.
Blessings to you in your Lenten journey.
Nancy

Trekking Into Lent

Blogging is new to me and the the structure and sacrificial aspect of Lent have prompted me to get started on my idea of comments and observation of trekking Catholic in today's world. I am a cradle Catholic, but as anyone who has lived for years belonging to any religion, voting group, or book club or practiced an artistic medium knows, life happens, viewpoints change. Faith becomes deeper, or fades. Catholicism is important to me. It defines me, I though that this Lent 2011 I would reflect a bit upon how that difference expresses itself in my actions, or reticence, my outlook and perhaps my feeling at home (or not) in the world. I am nervous about laying myself  'out there.' I am not a fan of the guest situations on talk shows, nor the sound bite of fame that seems to be natural to this generation. But I sense a need to speak up for and live my faith, to be accountable, and my hope is that blogging here each day of Lent will help me to discover that deep within myself. Be patient with me as I learn the process. I have fun using my digital camera and I hope to have many pictures to share. Illustrated books were always my favorites as a child. I may need to think and feel like one here to get to the proper place.
In addition to this project I am attempting a few other things for these next 40 Days. I have participated in the 40 Days for Life campaign for several years. This year I am going to give up reading fiction and drinking soda. I read that diet soda contributes to Alzheimer disease. That is in my family and I need all the help I can get to avoid it. Losing my mind is a great fear. I pray I will keep my senses every day. I pray my prayers will be answered. I really like diet coke. I figure a 40 day sacrifice will be a good jump start, and a sacrifice for a purpose, an end to abortion, is a worthy cause.
I am also giving up fiction. I belong to several book groups. I love fiction. I read a lot of it. I also know that I read to escape my pain, my responsibilities and my thoughts. I have escaped to Australia and Armenia in Gilgamesh by Joan London this month. I just finished Ped Pettersen's Out Stealing Horses, a book set in Norway.  And I just closed the cover on one of the Pink Carnation series, The Mischief of the Mistletoe , a story set in Jane Austen's world. My DH is planning on cutting off the cable contract. NHL is over. I know MLB is about to begin, but he is convinced getting the games over the net will be less expensive than with our cable company. It is true I also watch junk TV more often than I should. I am not giving up non-fiction. I just received Laura Hillebrand's Unbroken and want to continue to get to know the hero. We'll see how crazy I get without someone else's imaginary world.
Of course Lent also means prayer. I decided I am going to pray the Resentment Prayer, wishing all the good things of health and wealth and peace of mind for three people I do not like very well. I have heard it takes two weeks to really mean it. I shall see.
My positive action activity for Lent is to clean the basement. It has become a catch all for things that were stored there during the second story remodelling projects, my mother's stuff was piled up there as I could not face it after she died last July, and I have shelves and shelves of books that need to bless someone else. This cleaning the basement thing has been a "when the basement is cleaned, then I will have time to...(fill in the blank)". It is past time for me to get rid of that excuse. What are you doing for Lent?
Now this is out in the open. I have blogged for all the world to see what I am planning to do. We shall see how my plans commence and I shall tell you how God laughs. I just know that I am laughing now!
Blessings. Many blessings.
Nancy

What I am Reading

February 2011:
Still Alice by Lisa Genova